Basic Dating Do's and Do Not's: Just in Case You Don't Already Know

Everyone has had their experience with a bad date here and there. Maybe you didn't feel the chemistry with that person or you just could not get a good conversation going without it being awkward. It can really be frustrating at times, but it should not stop you from going on to meet new people and hopefully find that right one. Let's look at what the basic dating do's and don'ts are just in case you really don't know.

Don't date someone that you don't feel an attraction to. People will tell you all sorts of things, but date people that you like. He or she may have a great car or they may be extremely good looking, but if they are not your type, don't do it. Just because someone is nice looking does not mean you're going to be into them. Follow your gut and go with dating someone that you really feel that genuine attraction to.

Don't look at other guys or girls that you find attractive when you are out on a date. It's not only rude but it's not a very smart idea. If you want to be looking at other people, you should have gone out on your own instead of on a date. Be into the person you're on a date with and focus your attention on them.

Do feel confident on your date and do have a great time. Be a bit flirty and have an open and fun conversation with your date. Don't act like you're all clingy and need attention because that's going to be a turn off for your date. Relax and enjoy the company of your date. Show your date how interesting you can be and how much fun you are.

Dating agencies can be great ways to meet people too. When using dating agencies to meet someone there are some do's and don'ts you should keep in mind as well.

Do give the dating agency an up to date picture of yourself and one that shows you smiling. Someone looking for a date wants to see a person who looks happy and looks like they are fun to be around.

Do give the dating agency a unique profile about yourself. Give some interesting details so someone wants to find out a lot more about you and always say positive things.

Don't tell your date that you are tired of the dating scene or tell them about all your bad dates. Try to always say positive things with your new date.

Don't talk about your ex's. This is a no-no on a date. This is going to give your date the impression that you are not over the ex and not ready to move on. Keep the conversation on the both of you and learning about each other.

All in all, go out and have a great time on your date. Relax, have fun and learn all you can about this potential next person in your life.

Singles Say Random Facts About Themselves on Dating Sites Are Not a Good Practice

Similar to resumes for jobs, dating profiles have a tendency to be exaggerated by the users creating it. This is not too surprising in order to garner interest from the opposite sex and make the profile as pleasing as possible. In some cases, the users put up pictures of their youthful days and this can be as much as ten years! Perhaps most people's thinking behind these actions is to first get a male or female single interested in them and hopefully they will see the 'other side' of your redeeming qualities. However, one could argue that if the initial dissection of your profile was unimportant, then why do it in the first place?

In all honesty, it is always a good idea to be truthful upfront and then you don't have to make lame excuses during the date. Can you imagine, when you strike up a conversation about something during a date, you are fumbling to find a good excuse. You can come across as someone who is not always truthful and your dating partner may even consider you to be somewhat deceitful which can hinder the development of trust between the two. Often men can be forgiving of women who lie about their age since they understand how hard it is for them to attract men of their own age or younger. Some men are blessed with genes that make them look far younger than they are and lying about their age can also be forgiven by other women. Equally some men can look far older than their generation and in that respect they have a bit more convincing to do with their dating partner:-).

What many singles don't understand is that they can make their profile much more appealing without having to resort to fudging the dating profile in the online dating sites. Here are some examples:

1. Age
If you are concerned about you being too old or too young then there are tips you can use to convey to other members that 'age is all in the mind'. Here you need to highlight activities that does not in any way become representative of your age. Show the numerous activities that reveals your energy level and convey to the user the message that your interests and activities will continue into old age. Remember some young people can behave exceptionally lethargic and lazy and be less active than a typically older person. These qualities are not very appealing to many women or men for that matter.

2. Photo
If you have ever seen photos of yourself, you will find that you can look very different from one picture to another. This is mainly because of the lighting and angles at which photos were taken. You can easily take flattering photos of yourself by taking the shots in a natural setting. Make sure to take photos with outdoor light if possible and when the sun is not too high. Also use zoom with a higher aperture setting to make the face more flattering by blurring out the background. Try and experiment with pictures of yourself wearing various outfits since some colors can accentuate your face and looks. Have a photo session with your friend or friends, it can be fun and very productive. Remember photos can reveal a lot about you and not just the age, it can reveal your energy level, temperament and many other things related to your personality.

3. Content
Some people forget the importance of content. It is very surprising to find many users in online dating sites that fail to completely fill up their profile. This can send the wrong message to serious users who may think that life is too much of a rush for you and you may treat your dating partner in the same manner. Give careful thought as to what you want to say and by all means use buzzwords to attract attention. You can highlight the 'doing' stuff with words like 'love', 'excited', 'passionate' etc.

It's not necessary to fib on your dating profile in online dating sites when it comes to age, photos or any other content. There are many ways that you can make your profile more appealing without having to resort to such tactics. With some imagination and creativity you can easily make your profile very attractive to the opposite sex that points to your many redeeming qualities.

How to Attract a Man and Get Him to Chase You

It'll be nice if we can apply the phrase "go for what you want" in all areas of our lives including the love department. For a woman, we are taught to apply this backwards which means that men should do the chasing. Although it hardly makes sense these days, we cannot deny the fact that we, women, still want to be chased. Men love to work hard and winning a woman's heart is treated as an accomplishment. So, how do you get him to chase you?

This topic can easily get confusing as there are many contradicting views about it. I know one thing's for sure; playing games will not give you the result that you want. There are some dating rules that I just don't understand like you are not supposed to reply to a guy's text message until after 3 days or you should never return his call and let him ring your phone multiple times before you pick up. Women seem to play games today more than ever because of all the irrational ideas they are putting in our heads. What happened to being honest about your feelings?

If you want a man to pursue you, you have to make him realize your value. Men give importance to everything they have to work hard to achieve. It's simple, we naturally value something or someone more when we invest or work really hard on it. When you make everything easy for a guy, he won't treat you as his most prized possession. Keep in mind that we are treated exactly how we want to be treated. In other words, we teach people how to treat us. This does not mean though that you have to play hard-to-get to the point of pushing him away. Don't pretend that you are not interested in him at all when the truth is you want him and you are dying to spend time with him. Don't ever tell a guy you are not interested in him when you really are. Men can't read minds and they will not waste time trying to decipher a single sentence and all its hidden meaning. If you tell him you don't like him he will not go "Uhhmm maybe she wants me to work harder". If you can follow one principle in your relationship it should be "Always say what you mean and mean what you say". Once you learn how to do that, you won't have to deal with a lot of drama and frustrations down the road.

One thing that attracts men is positivity which means that frowning 24/7 is not allowed. When you radiate positive energy, you attract people who are positive as well. Don't spend hours talking on the phone about your ex or how bad your breakup was. It wouldn't make him stick around longer either if you fill him up with all the drama in your life each time he calls you. If all you do is whine about your appearance or sulk about your job or your mother who keeps letting you down, he would walk away from you.

If you want to get him to chase you, you have to learn how to compromise. Being flexible is a big plus for guys who are looking for a committed relationship. You can't go by the book and stick to your rules all the time because the more you do the more conflict you will encounter. Being open will result in a smoother partnership. If a guy feels that you are not willing to compromise to meet both of your needs, he will see nothing in the future but petty arguments. Prove to him that you are willing to compromise early on so he'll realize that you two are a making of a happy, couple.

Signs He Is Cheating Online

Online dating has increased our dating options but it has also opened up opportunities for cheating. Online cheating (as with ALL cheating) starts as emotional cheating where your man begins to share his feelings, dreams and hopes with another... and then progressively begins to be sexually stimulated by his online partner through sexy messages or images. The relationship may then progress to a meeting with her so that they can physically consummate a relationship that has already been consummated online. So how do you guard yourself from online cheating? How can you tell whether he is cheating online or not? What are the signs that he is cheating online?

1.Changing online habits. A man who starts to cheat on you online will change his online habits to match his new interest.

Increased secrecy! Since he is cheating on you then he will be increasingly secretive when he is online. He may suddenly shut down the computer or the window that he was engrossed in when you come close enough to see the computer screen. He may move the computer and place it in such a way that you can no longer easily see the screen or surprise him by your sudden appearance. When he is online and you come close to the screen he quickly shuts down 1 or more windows on some pretext... and it happens every single time. This is a clear sign that he is doing something online that he doesn't want you to know about.

Increased time online.The computer is his new best friend... and he neglects you to spend time with it. Whatever time he once spent on you is now spent with the computer. You may feel rather foolish since you are actually jealous of a computer... and he may play that card to get you to back off.

2.Diminished interest in you but more sex after his computer sessions. A man that is getting his emotional needs met somewhere else no longer needs to discuss things in depth like he used to do with you. You will feel very confused because on one hand there will be an emotional distance between the two of you but on the other hand he may want more sex since his online interest is arousing him. The sex will thus be mainly to fulfill his own needs... and he will often come already aroused by his online interest.

3.He smiles and sings like he did when you started dating. A man who is cheating on you online will be inexplicably happy... and dreamy. He may be with you physically but you will see him smile to himself as he reflects on something that made him happy... the other online woman. If you ask him why he is smiling he will give you some lame story that would not make any rational person smile.

If you see a number of these signs without a reasonable explanation then know that he may be cheating on you online... or watching pornography that he thinks that you would not approve of.

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How To Have Awesome Phone Conversations

If there's one thing that guys fear the most when it comes to Online Dating, it's that FIRST phone conversation.

Sure it's easy to write messages to women from the comfort of your own keyboard but you can't do that forever because eventually you MUST meet up with her in person.

Now, as I mentioned in other articles, there is a way to meet up with women without talking to them on the phone but there's always some girls who do want to chat before meeting in person.

That's OK... and it's nothing to fear!

You just need to be prepared when speaking on the phone and it's crucial that you follow all the "rules."

What are the secret "rules" for phone conversations with women?

Here's my list and make SURE you pay attention because if you don't, you'll screw it up and you WON'T be meeting her in person.

1. Avoid Neediness! - This should go without saying but neediness will KILL attraction every time! Always avoid needy behavior by demonstrating you're a HIGH value guy. If she starts to suspect you don't have a lot of options and you're placing too much importance on her... it's game over!


2. Phone Scheduling - Be sure you have an idea of her schedule and know the best times to call her so she'll ANSWER, eliminating the need to leave her a message. There are certain times in the evening that are IDEAL for placing calls because you know she will be home. Be sure and take advantage of that.


3. Have a Script - Now I'd rather you NOT memorize an entire phone conversation and recite it like you're giving a speech once you get her on the phone. That would come off as fake, and it will make you too nervous. But it helps to have an idea of what you're going to talk about. Write up some notes if you have to... (Hey, even George Costanza did this with success.)


4. Always Keep It Fun! - Make sure you keep the conversation light hearted and positive. Women are emotional creatures and WILL become MORE attracted to you if you make them laugh consistently! It's important to keep the positive momentum going that you had from emails. Did one of your messages really get her going?? Go back to that and use the same humor!


5. Avoid buzz killers! - When chatting on the phone, you always want to avoid those "buzz killing" topics like ex-girlfriends, a bad day at work, a recent death in the family, what's wrong with the world, economy etc, politics... really anything bad that's happened recently. Remember, it's all about positive momentum and nobody likes a "buzz kill."


6. Don't Talk Too Much! - That's right, if you're one of those that likes to talk about yourself all the time, try and curb it when talking to her on the phone. The ideal conversation is really about 75% her and 25% you. Now this will vary at times because of different personality types but you want to guide the conversation into fun positive directions and avoid dominating it.


7. Be Busy On The Phone - What I mean by this is try and be involved in something while talking to her on the phone. You know how women ALWAYS do this to guys... well do it right back! Women will often be driving, shopping, working out or something similar while chatting with guys. Well, you can do the same by being on your computer, working in the garage, or whatever while talking to her. It keeps the energy level high and also contributes more to the conversation. It also helps to avoid those awkward silences.


8. Keep It Short! - There's no need to have a first phone conversation go over fifteen minutes or so. In fact, even shorter is better. If you really hit it off then it's OK to go longer but typically you want to keep it brief. The best thing to do is get her laughing and then get off during a high point in the conversation. It takes some practice but once you perfect this art, you'll have a lot more success.


9. Talk Slowly - What I mean by this is talk with confidence and swagger. In most cases, talking fast assumes nervousness and you want to avoid that. Talk like you're chatting with a friend.


10. Know How To Leave a Message - Back before cell phones we had to worry about leaving messages on her machine every time we called her. Now we only need to do it once and that's after the first phone call. (This assumes you did not text her first.) When you do leave a message be sure it's quick, clear and to the point. Don't try and get cute as that will come off too "try hard."

Ok, there are your first phone conversation rules. Stick to them and you'll have her begging to meet you in person!!

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Let Go Of Emotional Baggage And Stop Feeling Emotionally Needy

Do you know that neediness is one of the greatest impediments to healthy and successful relationships? Do you know that the majority of people feel emotionally needy and they acquired this through early life conditioning that remains stored inside of them much like an old outdated computer program referred to as "emotional baggage"? Finally, do you know that is now possible to completely and permanently delete/erase this "emotional software" thereby restoring you to a whole, complete, emotionally independent, secure, self confident, capable adult? Want to learn more about how this might happen for you?

So how does one become needy and how can they be restored to a state of wholeness and emotional self sufficiency?

Well, let me start by saying that when you arrived here you were already whole and complete!

I know that many of you will find that hard to believe because that experience may feel totally unfamiliar to you.

Many of you have been led to believe that the reason you are feeling needy is because your parents failed to meet your needs for love, care, attention, validation, acceptance, understanding and so on and that they are somehow to blame for your current feelings of "deficiency".

As a result many of you continue to buy into the belief that there is a special someone out there who might be able to give you what your parents failed to supply you. This has led many of you to engage in relationships that might be referred to as "co-dependent" based on a hidden contract that goes something like:

"I'll fulfill your unmet needs if you fulfill mine".

When individuals feel they have found such a person and they agree to the contract they call this "falling in love". In fact all it is however is a contract of mutual exploitation and control. Does that sound like love to you?

Does it surprise you then that so many relationships built on such a premise fall apart so acrimoniously?

The wholeness that represented you at birth is often ignored and over ridden by the parent's need to meet their own unfulfilled needs. You simply became the vehicle/servant who was conceived to meet those needs.

In other words your true essence and purpose for being here was overridden by the need to please parents simply in order that you could survive your vulnerable baby and childhood years.
Unfortunately by the time you became a young adult you lost almost complete awareness of your essence and purpose and were so invested in playing out the expected roles thrust upon you that this left a deep feeling of emptiness inside.

That "emptiness" is a) responsible for all the feelings of neediness and b) is due to the "absence" of "You" in your mind/body and center of your life.

That emptiness can only be "filled in" by your restored presence. So how does that happen?

Well simply by deleting/erasing from your subconscious mind any/all roles and externally imprinted expectations that have nothing to do with you. These roles/expectations are laid down in the form of limiting negative beliefs and memories from early child hood i.e. what we commonly experience and refer to as "the emotional baggage"!

This erasure can now occur easily, effortlessly, permanently, and completely with a new coaching process developed a decade ago that is accessible to anyone who can read and write.

When one goes through this experience they find themselves returning to their Authentic Self which is an embodiment of feeling whole, emotionally self sufficient, complete, independent, secure, self confident, self assured, self respecting and mature to name a few.

In my view it is only from this place from within one's self that truly healthy relationships can emerge.

If you would like to stop feeling emotionally needy then kindly go the web site below where you can request a free introductory telephone/Skype coaching consultation that will begin to help you on your way to wholeness and successful relationships today.

My Date Had A Great Time And I Didn't - How Do I Tell Him/Her?

Have you ever been out on a date with someone and it didn't go so hot? What if you got a text later that night from your date telling you how much fun she/he had? How do you tell someone that you didn't have as much on your date that they did? This isn't going to be easy, but the truth is best if it comes out now instead of later.

The Problem Will Not Go Away

Many people's first reaction when faced with this dilemma will be to simply not contact the person again. This of course is easy if you don't mind hurting the other person. However, if your date had a great time and you didn't and you suddenly stop contacting them, that is going to hurt much worse than the truth ever would.

For that reason, it is always best to let the other person down easy. It's good for karma, it'll make you feel better and it'll at least give the other person closure as to why the relationship didn't work.

Now, you have a decision to make. Do you want to see this person again? Don't be so rash to kick the person out of your life forever. There must be some reason why the two of you went out. Was it a physical attraction or was there something more? Why didn't you two have a good date? Was it situational? Was the restaurant too busy? Was the food awful? Or was your date simply boring?

Before you contact the other person, think very hard as to why the date didn't go as planned. If you do want to see the other person, you'll want to ask them out again. You will also want to mention the bad date.

If You Do Want To See The Person Again

The moment the person texts or tells you that they had a great time, tell them that you didn't. Just come out and say it. You can say something along the lines of, "You had a great time? Me? Not so much." Of course they are going to wonder why. You can decide to tell them or you can simply say, "I'd just like to try again if that's ok." The other person will want to make the date extra special and it's much more likely to go as planned this time.

If You Don't Want To See the Person

Depending on how you feel more comfortable, you should pick up the phone and call or text the other person to say that you are sorry, but you're just not interested in them at this time. You don't have to mention the bad date if it's not obvious. If your date chews with their mouth open, you don't have to tell them about their bad manners if you don't want to. Of course, telling them will help them improve, which could help them improve their chances at finding a match later on.

Or you can simply tell them that you're not interested and that you'd like to see other people. Most people will leave it at that and you'll be able to end things easily while providing the much needed closure the other person wants and deserves.

This article is sponsored by medical case study.